Freakin’ Bats…

Through all my church years I always heard…”Joy comes in the morning” …that’s great, but who the F*** is Joy and when is she gonna get here?

Even after a full nights sleep I often wake up lost. I had a good day yesterday. But this morning I’m sort of in between. My mind races to Work, Money, Family, Kids etc. Stuff I have no control over- and I know this, but it’s automatic. It’s in my nature. It’s hard-wired from the factory.

In fact sometimes I’m surprised I can sleep at all. (my BP meds apparently cause fatigue, so this must be helping) …mental health days being what they are, I need more of them. Can I build them into a flex account at work?

This is a mental health life.

It’s all in my head. Rattling around like a marble in a glass jar. Like a bird trapped in your house, flying into walls and windows looking for a way out.

Actually it’s more like bats. The proverbial bats in the bell tower.

Shit, I have bats.

Sometimes quiet helps, certainly music helps….but interaction with people who can listen lets me talk it out and that seems to quiet the bats. The bats stop flying and all seems ok with the world.

It’s when my mind wanders that they take off again… I feel like an announcement needs to be made…”The Bats are flying again people, watch out”

Freakin’ bats.

Maybe when Joy gets here she can help with the bats…

The key is under the mat Joy. Let yourself in…


Published in: on November 11, 2009 at 10:05 am  Leave a Comment  
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